at last, the day has come. my exile is over, and i shall return to the land of milk, honey, and spoiled brats!
strangely i feel very composed. lackadaisacal, almost. maybe that's because despite the fact that my bags are packed, and i've loaded up my fifty pound backpack with all the books i bought and read while i was here, i still don't believe i will actually get to leave. i am waiting and cringing like a dog that got smacked around too much and winces when someone reaches out to pet it.
26 days...26 days have passed since i last saw my husband and kids. i still imagine art in his suit and nerd pouch (wearing the suit so it wouldn't get wrinkled in the luggage)and the boys, big-eyed and tearful and feverish, separated from me by thick glass and security guards. it seems like a dream that happened a long time ago. living in novorossysk seems just as unreal; the only reality that i can think of is the one where i'm looking at flowery wallpaper on one wall and a big persian rug on the other, counting the days till my sentence runs out.
of course, my wardens were nice enough, and i occasionally got to escape the crushing claustrophobic confines of my ridiculously skinny room. i had a roof over my head and too much food and didn't have to do anything of any consequence. but still. it sucks to be where you don't want to be and miss your family.
but now i'm going home!!! ha! wherever that is!! home is where the heart is, as the cliche goes. but cliche or not, my heart is currently living in north carolina, and thus north carolina, for however long it lasts, will be home.
dang i'm eloquent when i haven't slept...